Reflections on Dating
So today I was writing a new friend in response to a question they asked. It actually was close to the topic I'm now blogging on but not exactly. However, you know how the brain works...it wasn't a hop skip and a jump to go from question one to this list (more like a blink.) The topic was dating and I was explaining how it is odd for me to think of dating as positive. And I didn't go into specifics in the letter but then I started thinking....and tonight the highlights seem funny, so let's list them shall we?
1. Went on two dates with a guy--and he decided he'd rather be gay.
2. Went on one date with a guy--I was the last to see him alive.
3. Went on one date with a guy--I saw my life flash before my eyes and I begged God not to let me die in the car with this guy.
4. I've had no less than 5 stalkers!!!
4.1 one of which should have been incarcerated and/or sentenced to die--firing squad or lethal injection...whichever, and no I don't say this lightly or in humor, he was/is serial killer disturbing--he mentioned cuffing me up at one point and yes giggled/laughed as if it would be a good time while inside I was thinking 'oh shit!' He also gave me a confession that still gives me nightmares.
4.2 one proposed marriage during our first conversation, it wasn't even a date, he sat down at the table and started in on the reasons why I was selected and what our first kids would be like
4.3-4.5 the other three are interesting too, but less freaky...don't get me wrong...still freaky as they are in the stalker category....just not so bad...one of these three is still in the semi-active stage, I'm hoping he'll go away soon
5. Another date--Dr. Jeckyll & Mr. Hyde (let's just say I outran him)
6. Antoher 1st date--I was propositioned to be a night light after no signs of interest---we were on opposite sides of a room...no joke...(he asked me if I was sure, I said no...and then again, after the second refusal....I was contemplating where exactly to hit him to get away when he asked a third time...he eventually let me go though, w/o violence)
7. Another 1st date--and he had a fixation on feeding me the entire Cheesecake factory menu and wouldn't let it drop that I really only wanted one meal. (For those who haven't been there the menu at this particular joint is like 65 pages long)
8. I was asked on a date, he picked me up and then his mom. Of all of the ones listed here this one was actually a sweet guy, the date was weird, but at least I wasn't lamenting my lack of self defense skills or worried about his hands.
These are just a few highlights...I've been on other dates, some blind, some not; been stood up, etc, etc, just like we all have. However, these particular ones cause of the greatest negative impressions I have of dating and while I still twinge when I say/use the word 'date'.
The tide seems to have turned though. I am now dating someone and it's a good thing. It's very bizarre and it still takes my head a moment to process. So let this be a token of hope for any out there who like me used to think of dating as either tempting fate or a very creative way to commit suicide. Don't give up. Good ones exist. I still want to call the going out with a good guy a different thing...the english language of the modern world needs another name for this process...in the olden days there were many phrases...let's just say being courted is a good thing. I think it will take years of rehab for dating to be a good thing in my head. However, dating does produce fun stories...if you live to tell them....and if enough time passes to the point they become funny.
